To Be Still and Know...The Truth About Complaining
"Do everything without complaining and arguing." Philippians 2:14
That verse right there pretty much says it all doesn't it? I remember the first time I read this verse a few years ago. I had been dealing with my children's incessant complaining about everything and when I read it I made it our household verse. It's easy to remember and understand. Then we made a complaint chart for all of us to see how many times in a week we complain. Wow was that an eye opener! I wish I could say I complained the least, but to be honest I was right there at the top and that was just the complaining I did out loud! I definitely would have been in first place by far if I had included all the complaining I did in my head.
Complaining has become an epidemic in our society. We all do it and we do it so often it becomes our way of life without us even realizing it. Take a moment to think about all the many ways you have complained in the past 24 hours. For me it would be complaining that my daughter never puts anything away, that my son only hears what I don't want him to, my other son won't poop in the potty, having to get up early, my various aches and pains, my house being a mess of clothes as I swap out kids closets for fall, more dirt on the floor even though I just vacuumed and swept, and the list goes on. That's just in 24 hours. So what's the problem with complaining? We are just venting lifes frustrations right? Life is full of frustrations and disappointments and irritations. I am not saying you should pretend everything is a bed of roses but rather that you try to be aware of amount of complaining that you are doing. Complaining doesn't make the irritation any better, in fact it makes it worse because you are dwelling on the negative. You know that saying "one mans trash is another mans treasure."? That same can be said of our complaints. When I complain about having to sweep the floors, or do the laundry or clean up the dishes, I am forgetting that some people don't have a floor to sweep, clothes to wash and put away or food to eat. When I complain that my kids are driving me up the wall, I am forgetting that other peoples children are in hospitals fighting for their lives or worse. When I complain that my toddler keeps pooping in his underwear at nap time instead of using the potty, I am forgetting that he really is doing great with potty training given that he's not quite 2 and a half and stays dry all day long. When I complain that my feet hurt from my plantars fasciitis, I am forgetting that I have the ability to walk and get exercise. When I complain that I have another headache, I am forgetting that there are people who have debilitating migraines that prevent them from functioning at times. When I complain that my house is too small, I am forgetting that our house payment is lower than most people's by far. When I complain that my house is a wreck from stuff being everywhere, I am forgetting to be thankful for all that stuff. You get the picture.Everything we have comes from God and everything we do should be done for Him. "Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." Ephesians 6:7
Whatever we focus our minds on is what is going to come out, both in our words and actions. If we allow ourselves to have a lifestyle of complaining we lose our zeal and joy for this life God's given us. We forget to see Him in the midst of even the most mundane things. "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior." Ephesians 4:31 While this verse isn't dealing directly with complaining, I do believe that complaining is a form of bitterness and anger. God doesn't want those to be apart of our life as His children. It robs us of joy and peace.
"And now dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worth of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me-everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8-9 Be still and know that God wants us to be actively choosing to focus our minds on things that are righteous and good and pure. Things that will bring forth a spirit of thankfulness in our lives. His promise to us if we choose to put this type of thinking into practice is that He will give us His peace and His peace is a priceless gift of being confident that He is always at work and you are never alone no matter what is going on. Remember it takes about 21 days to form a new habit so it will take awhile to get out of the habit of complaining and into the habit of looking at things through a fresh thankful perspective. And if you have been a Christian for very long at all you will know that when you choose to change something in your life that needs changing there will be many situations that will come your way in order to test you, to give you practical ways to put a new way of thinking into practice! But remember "For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13 We cannot do anything by our own strength. It is the Holy Spirit at work within us that enables us to grow and change. "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. There is no law against these things!" Galatians 5:22-23 Look at what the Holy Spirit living in us can do if we allow Him to! Complaining is the opposite of self control and patience. How refreshing it is to be around someone who doesn't complain all the time. Someone who just emanates the fruits of the spirit! I want to be that kind of woman! I want to be refreshing to people not draining.
I am not saying that we should bottle up all our feelings inside and never say anything that isn't happy and cheerful! Goodness no! That's not realistic. And there are things in life that are truly difficult. Please pour out your hurts and frustrations firstly to the Lord and then find a couple of really good Christian friends to pour out your heart to as well. God wants us to be real with one another, to comfort one another. This particular post is about the superficial complaining we all do too much of and a challenge to keep a chart of how much you complain for a week. It will open your eyes and hopefully your hearts!
"I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." John 16:33
That verse right there pretty much says it all doesn't it? I remember the first time I read this verse a few years ago. I had been dealing with my children's incessant complaining about everything and when I read it I made it our household verse. It's easy to remember and understand. Then we made a complaint chart for all of us to see how many times in a week we complain. Wow was that an eye opener! I wish I could say I complained the least, but to be honest I was right there at the top and that was just the complaining I did out loud! I definitely would have been in first place by far if I had included all the complaining I did in my head.
Complaining has become an epidemic in our society. We all do it and we do it so often it becomes our way of life without us even realizing it. Take a moment to think about all the many ways you have complained in the past 24 hours. For me it would be complaining that my daughter never puts anything away, that my son only hears what I don't want him to, my other son won't poop in the potty, having to get up early, my various aches and pains, my house being a mess of clothes as I swap out kids closets for fall, more dirt on the floor even though I just vacuumed and swept, and the list goes on. That's just in 24 hours. So what's the problem with complaining? We are just venting lifes frustrations right? Life is full of frustrations and disappointments and irritations. I am not saying you should pretend everything is a bed of roses but rather that you try to be aware of amount of complaining that you are doing. Complaining doesn't make the irritation any better, in fact it makes it worse because you are dwelling on the negative. You know that saying "one mans trash is another mans treasure."? That same can be said of our complaints. When I complain about having to sweep the floors, or do the laundry or clean up the dishes, I am forgetting that some people don't have a floor to sweep, clothes to wash and put away or food to eat. When I complain that my kids are driving me up the wall, I am forgetting that other peoples children are in hospitals fighting for their lives or worse. When I complain that my toddler keeps pooping in his underwear at nap time instead of using the potty, I am forgetting that he really is doing great with potty training given that he's not quite 2 and a half and stays dry all day long. When I complain that my feet hurt from my plantars fasciitis, I am forgetting that I have the ability to walk and get exercise. When I complain that I have another headache, I am forgetting that there are people who have debilitating migraines that prevent them from functioning at times. When I complain that my house is too small, I am forgetting that our house payment is lower than most people's by far. When I complain that my house is a wreck from stuff being everywhere, I am forgetting to be thankful for all that stuff. You get the picture.Everything we have comes from God and everything we do should be done for Him. "Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." Ephesians 6:7
Whatever we focus our minds on is what is going to come out, both in our words and actions. If we allow ourselves to have a lifestyle of complaining we lose our zeal and joy for this life God's given us. We forget to see Him in the midst of even the most mundane things. "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior." Ephesians 4:31 While this verse isn't dealing directly with complaining, I do believe that complaining is a form of bitterness and anger. God doesn't want those to be apart of our life as His children. It robs us of joy and peace.
"And now dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worth of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me-everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8-9 Be still and know that God wants us to be actively choosing to focus our minds on things that are righteous and good and pure. Things that will bring forth a spirit of thankfulness in our lives. His promise to us if we choose to put this type of thinking into practice is that He will give us His peace and His peace is a priceless gift of being confident that He is always at work and you are never alone no matter what is going on. Remember it takes about 21 days to form a new habit so it will take awhile to get out of the habit of complaining and into the habit of looking at things through a fresh thankful perspective. And if you have been a Christian for very long at all you will know that when you choose to change something in your life that needs changing there will be many situations that will come your way in order to test you, to give you practical ways to put a new way of thinking into practice! But remember "For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13 We cannot do anything by our own strength. It is the Holy Spirit at work within us that enables us to grow and change. "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. There is no law against these things!" Galatians 5:22-23 Look at what the Holy Spirit living in us can do if we allow Him to! Complaining is the opposite of self control and patience. How refreshing it is to be around someone who doesn't complain all the time. Someone who just emanates the fruits of the spirit! I want to be that kind of woman! I want to be refreshing to people not draining.
I am not saying that we should bottle up all our feelings inside and never say anything that isn't happy and cheerful! Goodness no! That's not realistic. And there are things in life that are truly difficult. Please pour out your hurts and frustrations firstly to the Lord and then find a couple of really good Christian friends to pour out your heart to as well. God wants us to be real with one another, to comfort one another. This particular post is about the superficial complaining we all do too much of and a challenge to keep a chart of how much you complain for a week. It will open your eyes and hopefully your hearts!
"I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." John 16:33
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